The Juggle Zone: Bargain Blog

Staples sent out some spam regarding a $25,000 reward that they're giving to the inventor of the winning entry in their "Invention Quest." As I began to peruse the list of 12 finalists, I discovered one problem after another with each idea. Here goes:

#1 WordLock
OFFICE PROBLEM: Lock combinations made up of random numbers are hard to remember.
EASY IDEA: WordLock uses easy-to-remember words instead. Simply turn the wheels until the correct spelling of the word appears.
FAULT(S): Standard combination locks have 50 positions, 3 numbers in the code, meaning 125,000 combinations. The WordLock would have only 17,576 combinations, unless more wheels were added internally, which would necessitate more spinning of the dial (one more wheel, which would require 4 extra spins, would provide a total of 456,976 combinations), and a bigger lock (to accommodate the extra wheel).

#2 Call Caddy
OFFICE PROBLEM: Corded phones are inconvenient, but replacing them with cordless models is expensive.
EASY IDEA: The Call Caddy turns any existing corded telephone into a cordless phone. Just unplug the cord connecting the handset to the base, and plug the Call Caddy transceiver devices into the handset and base jacks.
FAULT(S): The expensive part of cordless phones is the transceiver devices. Buying separate transceivers wouldn't create any substantive cost savings, but would create bulky handsets. Additionally, how (and where) is the transceiver for the handset supposed to be attached?

#3 Rubber Bandits
OFFICE PROBLEM: Rubber bands secure items together but do not identify what they are.
EASY IDEA: The Rubber Bandit is a rubber band with a pre-attached label. Just write on the label, and items remain together and identified.
FAULT(S): Good luck reliably attaching anything to a rubber band. As they stretch, most bonds are broken. Furthermore, rubber bands are usually reused many times. Are these "labels" erasable? Why not just stick a post-it on the pile?

#4 Exact-Cut Lighted Paper Cutter
OFFICE PROBLEM: Correctly lining up paper on a paper cutter can be tricky.
EASY IDEA: The Exact-Cut Lighted Paper Cutter casts a crisp silhouette through the paper, so the location of the cut is immediately visible.
FAULT(S): Paper cutters are often used for thick stock or piles of stock, through which light cannot pass. A physical guide along the top of the material being cut (like those on rotary cutters, which work wonders for single sheets of paper) would be much more useful, and wouldn't require a power source.

#5 PencilPaper
OFFICE PROBLEM: Paper cannot be reused conveniently and disintegrates when wet. White boards can be erased and reused, but the writing smears easily.
EASY IDEA: PencilPaper is a unique write-and-erase surface created especially for use with ordinary pencils and erasers. It can be reused indefinitely, and the writing never smears.
FAULT(S): First of all, pencil smears, forever (in contrast to ink which dries and stops smearing). Most wasted paper is "written on" via printers and copiers, for which there is no existing erasable technology.

#6 Palm Stapler
OFFICE PROBLEM: Putting up notices on bulletin boards is difficult with standard staplers.
EASY IDEA: The Palm Stapler attaches to the user’s palm for use on vertical surfaces, such as bulletin boards, and leaves the other hand free to pick up the next piece of paper.
FAULT(S): Having hung up many notices myself, the problem is not keep one hand free, but two. If you just hold a regular stapler in one hand, it's about the same as having that stapler attached to your hand. Either way, the hand is out of commission. The optimal solution would be to hold the stapler in one hand, the pile of notices in a second, and use the third to hold a single sign as it is being attached to the bulletin board by the first. But being human, we only have two hands. Had this invention been a forearm-mounted stapler, there'd be something to talk about. Imagine having both hands free.

#7 Peanut Eater
OFFICE PROBLEM: Packing peanuts are statically charged, so they clog vacuum cleaners and are very difficult to clean up by hand.
EASY IDEA: The Peanut Eater attaches to any vacuum cleaner and collects packing peanuts in a bag for disposal or reuse.
FAULT(S): Beyond the fact that such an item exists (AKA vacuum attachments), the same static that causes vacuuming problems will attach dirt and hair to the peanuts, especially when both are forced into the same space via vacuum. Who wants to have dirt or hair on the packing material they hope to reuse?

#8 Z-Pins
OFFICE PROBLEM: Personalizing cubicles is difficult, as regular nails cannot be inserted into the fabric walls.
EASY IDEA: Z-Pins are shaped to allow for insertion into fabric cubicle walls and bear enough weight to support framed artwork.
FAULT(S): Beyond the fact that there are items that serve this general purpose (there are devices that attach to the cubical frame and enable the hanging of heavy items such as framed art and bulletin boards), cubicle walls are inherently weak structures - only the frames are strong. No matter how well any Z-Pin is inserted into the wall, the wall will not be able to support any substantive amount of weight.

#9 Pop Envelopes
OFFICE PROBLEM: Shipping envelopes come in standard sizes – some are too small and others are much too big.
EASY IDEA: Pop Envelopes are shipping envelopes that expand on demand to fit larger items. The mailers grow in width and length, so they take up little space when being stored, but can accommodate large items.
FAULT(S): There are two ways objects change size - stretching and unfolding. If the material is itself stretchable, it will be weak (think about using a balloon as an envelope) and/or expensive. If the material is not stretchable, accordion style folding (or similar) would be used to create a fancy large envelope that will conform to its contents no better than an envelope the size of the maximum expansion of the Pop Envelope.

#10 Presentation Master
OFFICE PROBLEM: One-dimensional presentation displays are dull and cannot be easily customized.
EASY IDEA: Presentation Master is a simple connector system that turns ordinary one-dimensional foam core into dynamic presentation materials. It uses just one small part to connect foam core panels edge to edge, at as many as 6 angles, so the panels stand up unassisted.
FAULT(S): A key characteristic of displays is portability. One-dimensional (really they meant two-dimensional - one dimension defines a line with no thickness) presentations are fairly strong and easy to transport. A three-dimensional presentation is weaker (more easily subject to damage) and very difficult to transport. While the connectors could be made like hinges to help solve the transportability issue, they would need to lock into place to maintain the proper three dimensional shape at presentation time. As each mechanism becomes more complex, both the price and chance of failure, go up.

#11 Pop Pins
OFFICE PROBLEM: Ordinary pushpins can cause injury when taken out of the box.
EASY IDEA: Pop Pins are pushpins that have a molded shell that acts as a guard for the metal spike. When a user pushes the pin into a wall or corkboard, the shell folds back on itself to expose the spike to the wall, instead of the user’s fingers.
FAULT(S): Pins are cheap. Adding moving parts (seemingly spring loaded no less) is expensive. If being poked is such a concern, sell the pins embedded in a small sheet of cardboard (as thumbtacks sometimes are).

#12 Xact-fit Pens
OFFICE PROBLEM: Pens are not comfortable when used for more than a few minutes at a time.
EASY IDEA: Xact-fit Pens have a layer of malleable plastic that is easily molded to fit each user. Before the initial use of the pen, the user simply heats the plastic and applies the pressure of his or her normal grip to create a custom fit.
FAULT(S): There are many pens on the market that have varying degrees of comfort grips that mold to the user's hands, usually not even requiring heat. Furthermore, by not maintaining that molding permanently, multiple people are able to enjoy a comfortable pen, instead of just one.

Not that there is much chance that the patents on these items will ever amount to anything, but I think it'd be real funny if somebody actually patented any of these ideas before Staples got around to it (assuming they haven't already).